I Just Can’t, Can I?

By CreativeWings, 7 February, 2011

Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. – John Wooden

How often do you let what you can’t do, stop you from doing what you can do?

You know the feeling, you have the best of intentions to do something, and then when you stop to think about what needs to be done, suddenly, there are a hundred different reasons why you can’t, and furthermore, shouldn’t even try.

This happens for many of us even when the thing to be done is something enjoyable or even beneficial to us.

How many times has this happened to you?
Why am I writing about this? Could it be that this is something that I too struggle with? In a word, yes.

I am very good at coming up with reasons that I cannot do something.

I am working on recognizing this when it happens, and on ways that will keep me moving forward.

One of the most effective ways I have discovered is to make a list of all of the “can’t” reasons. I write down everything I can think of no matter what.
Take a moment to look at the list you have composed; is there anything that really could keep you from doing what you want to do?
How many of the things you wrote are simply untrue or ridiculous? Cross those off your list right away.
Now that you have your whittled down list, go through them item by item and decide what needs to be done to turn those “can’ts” into “cans”.

Guess what? You’ve just begun the process of not letting what you cannot do stop you from what you can do.

Congratulations!

Control Issues

By CreativeWings, 17 January, 2011

Control is never achieved when sought after directly. It is the surprising outcome of letting go. – James Arthur Ray

What does “letting go” mean?

For me, it means letting go of my concept of how something is “supposed” to be.

It means letting go of my image of how I “should” be, how my family and friends “should” be, and how any given situation “should” turn out.

This is not an easy challenge for me. I know it’s not easy for many of us.

I, like many people, have a definite vision for how things should go. The reality is, things seldom go exactly the way I envisioned. People seldom behave and react in the way I expected.

And, do you know what? When I take the time to see things and people the way they are instead of the way my limited perception expected, it opens up possibilities and experiences I never could have imagined. Almost always, for the better.

In terms of the people around you, letting go allows you to really get to know them and appreciate them for the amazing people that they are. It takes the pressure off of them when they’re not trying to live up to your expectations of who they’re supposed to be, and you get to know them without judgment clouding your vision.
It’s a win-win situation.

You get to know them and they in turn get the opportunity to share who they really are with you.

What’s the first step in letting go?

Like so many things, the first step is realizing that there is room for improvement, and choosing to make a change.

Start right now.

In what way can you let go of your perception of control?